Been a while

Randomly felt like blogging tonight for the first time in a year and a half or so!

I wish for more time to do the things that really matter in life. Like watching the rain fall in the streetlights, or listening to crickets in the summertime, or dancing, or skipping down the streets as they glisten in the moonlight, or hanging out with people you love.

Granted, I do a lot of these things as often as I possibly can. It's just that sometimes, Monday is just around the corner, and I realize that I have to go to work and be responsible and all that jazz just so I can have money to live and eat and do the things that matter. I often play the "what if" game: what if we won the lottery? What would we do with that money? We have all sorts of crazy dreams, from owning a house in Montford for all our actor friends to live in to buying a horse ranch (or, Scott's personal dream, to own a helicopter).

Tonight, however, we were watching his favorite movie, which is Groundhog's Day, and I started playing the "what if" game a different way. What if my life were like that movie? What would I do with that day, over and over, if I knew everything would just start out the same way again tomorrow and there would be no consequences? I know after a while it would get boring, and I'm sure I would eventually just go insane. But just assuming that, in the end, February 3rd would finally come....I mean, it'd be unlimited time. I'd have time for everything. I'd go visit people I haven't seen in too long. I'd convince my friends, one by one, to play hooky from work so we could spend one entire day hanging out together. I'd do some of the things Bill Murrey does in the movie, like learn to play piano (oh, lord, would that I had listened to my parents and taken lessons as a child). And I'd do really silly things, too, like get a different haircut every day to see which one I like the best, since I have such a hard time changing my hairstyle (it's really been the same since I was eleven, except for one perm and one experiment with cutting it to my shoulders). I'd spend days just reading books that I've never gotten to. I'd search for my dream house here in Asheville in the hopes that once tomorrow finally came, I could at least know what I wanted, even if I couldn't afford to buy it. I mean, the possibilities are limitless!

It kind of makes me sad that I don't have the ambition to do some of these things even without unlimited time to accomplish them. But honestly, I'm just not that ambitious. I certainly don't just sit at home every day; anyone who knows me knows that I take every chance I get to get out there and do things with people. It just kind of sucks that the majority of my day, of all our days, have to be spent making money just so we can have the means to get by.

In a nutshell: I wish I had more time to dance.